Debbie McRae Counseling & Coaching
Betrayal Trauma-Therapy in Arizona & Coaching Worldwide

What happened to you was real.
So is the path forward.

Specialized therapy and coaching for individuals healing from the trauma of intimate betrayal caused by their partner's out of control sexual behaviors, pornography use or infidelity — led by a therapist who has dedicated her career to supporting betrayed partners. Therapy in person in Mesa and online across Arizona; coaching available anywhere in the world.

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200+ Clients Helped
Licensed in Arizona Certified Life Coach Certified Sex Addiction Therapist EMDR Certified Sex Therapist In-Person and Telehealth

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What Brought You Here

The ground shifted
the moment you found out.

Betrayal trauma doesn't just hurt—it reorganizes your entire reality.
These are some of the ways it shows up.

The discovery

You found out — and your world collapsed in an instant. Nothing before that moment feels safe to trust anymore.

The replay

You can't stop cycling through it — the timeline, the lies, the moments you missed. Your mind keeps searching for the part that makes sense.

Questioning everything

You're second-guessing your own instincts. Was any of it real? How did you not see it? You don't trust yourself the way you used to.

No one around you gets it

The people who love you want to help, but they don't understand why you can't just decide and move on. The isolation makes everything heavier.

Stay or leave: both feel impossible

You're not sure what you want or what the right answer is. And the pressure to decide before you've had a chance to breathe is its own kind of pain.

The grief underneath the anger

You're grieving the relationship you thought you had, the future you planned, and a version of yourself that felt safe in the world. That's a real loss.

What Goes Unaddressed
Betrayal trauma doesn't resolve on its own. The longer it goes without specialized support, the deeper the wound can go.

Your nervous system stays on high alert — scanning for threats, bracing for the next rupture. Trust in yourself and in your instincts erodes further. The grief cycles without anywhere to land. And the isolation of carrying this quietly takes its own quiet toll.

This isn't a character flaw. This is what happens when a profound wound doesn't get the specific kind of attention it requires.

A Specialized Path Forward

Betrayal trauma therapy is different work.

Betrayal requires a specific kind of treatment, one that understands how this particular wound forms, where it lives in the body, and what the process of healing actually looks like. This isn't general couples counseling. It isn't standard talk therapy.

The work begins with stabilization. Helping you feel safer in your own nervous system, reducing the intensity of symptoms, and building the ground you need to make decisions from a place of clarity rather than panic.

From there, we go deeper — processing what happened, rebuilding trust in your own instincts, and reclaiming the parts of yourself that betrayal displaced.

When both partners want to rebuild, the work expands. Couples healing from betrayal requires its own framework, one that holds the betrayed partner's trauma while creating conditions for genuine repair. This means working on trust, attachment, and emotional safety together, at a pace the relationship can sustain.

EMDR Therapy
Brainspotting (BSP)
Accelerated Resolution Therapy
Prodependence Model
Betrayal Trauma Coaching
Early Recovery Couples Empathy
Debbie McRae, LPC, CSAT — Betrayal Trauma Therapist in Mesa, AZ
Credential CSAT Certified
Your Guide Through This

Debbie McRae

LPC · CSAT · Betrayal Coach · EMDR-Certified

I'm a Licensed Professional Counselor and one of the country's Certified Sex Addiction Therapists (CSAT), a credential that requires advanced specialized training specifically in sexual addiction and its impact on partners, couples, and families. It's not a general therapy—it's focused specifically on understanding and treating the complexities of betrayal and relational rupture.

My work centers on helping women heal from the deep impact of betrayal—whether from their partner's infidelities, pornography use, or out-of-control sexual behaviors. I also specialize in working with couples who want to repair and rebuild their relationship after betrayal, guiding them through the process of healing the rupture in trust, attachment, and emotional safety.

I also run webinars through Seeking Integrity, a nationally recognized organization in the sexual addiction recovery field, and have worked with hundreds of betrayed partners navigating the same pain you're in right now.

"All stories of betrayal are different. The pain is the same."

LPC CSAT CCPS-C EMDR Certified Brainspotting EFT ERCEM Certified Certified Life Coach Sex Therapist Cert.
Why This Practice

There's a reason betrayal trauma requires a specialist.

A few things worth knowing before you decide.

01 — Credential

The CSAT credential is rare and specific

There are only a few thousand CSAT-certified therapists in the country. This credential requires extensive post-graduate training in sexual addiction, its neurological underpinnings, and the partner trauma that follows. It's not a general certification.

02 — Framework

A different framework: Prodependence

Rather than labeling betrayed partners as codependent, the Prodependence model recognizes that loving and depending on a partner is healthy — and that the trauma that follows betrayal deserves compassion, not a clinical label.

03 — Community

Healing doesn't have to happen alone

Beyond 1:1 sessions, there is a group pathway for women in betrayal recovery — structured support alongside others who understand. Community is part of how people heal from this kind of wound.

04 — Approach

Body-based methods, not just conversation

Betrayal trauma lives in the nervous system, not just in thought. EMDR, Brainspotting, and ART are all body-based approaches that work at the level where this kind of wound actually resides.

Inside the Work

What sessions actually look like.

Therapy for betrayal trauma isn't about reliving everything in painful detail. It's structured, progressive, and trauma-informed — meaning the work meets you where your nervous system actually is, not where you think you should be.

Stabilization first

Before anything else, we build your ability to regulate. Tools for your nervous system, safety within sessions, and a pace that doesn't retraumatize.

Trauma processing in your body

EMDR and Brainspotting work differently than talk therapy. They access where trauma is stored neurologically — without requiring you to narrate every detail.

Reclaiming your life

The final phase is about reclaiming — your instincts, your identity, your sense of what's possible for you. That includes your relationship with your own sexuality, your sense of self, and for those doing relational repair work, the possibility of rebuilding trust within the relationship.

Group support available

Individual therapy can be supplemented with group work, a structured space alongside other women in betrayal recovery. Being witnessed by people who understand is its own kind of healing.

Relational repair & attachment

For couples ready to rebuild, the work turns toward the relationship itself — restoring attachment, emotional safety, and trust between partners. Using the Early Recovery Couples Empathy Model, we create the conditions for genuine repair at a pace the relationship can sustain.

Beyond 1:1 Sessions

Healing is faster when you're not carrying it alone.

There's something powerful about being in a room — even a virtual one — with women who are living the same relational pain. The "Healing Beyond Betrayal" Support Group meets weekly and offers a pathway for healing in a safe environment where you experience deeper, structured support.

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Getting Started

The path from here looks like this.

Four simple steps. No pressure, no commitment before you're ready.

Book a Free Call

A low-pressure 15 minutes to talk about what you're carrying, ask your questions, and see if this feels like the right fit.

Build Your Plan

Together we will map out what the work looks like for your specific situation in your first session—goals, pace, and what healing means to you.

Begin the Work

Weekly sessions in the early days of betrayal—using proven, trauma-informed methods. You'll start to feel the difference in your nervous system as you move out of crisis.

Reclaim Yourself

Trust returns—first in yourself, in your ability to heal, then in your instincts. You will build on a foundation that betrayal can't touch, one that supports post-traumatic growth.

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Therapy in Arizona & Coaching Worldwide

In-Person and Telehealth Available

Therapy is available at the Mesa office or via secure telehealth across Arizona. For clients outside Arizona, Debbie offers coaching worldwide — she works with people across the USA and internationally, including Canada, Japan, China, Dubai, and Iceland.

Address

2500 S. Power Rd.
Suite 222, Mesa, AZ 85209

Phone

480-255-8086

Telehealth

Therapy across Arizona · Coaching worldwide

Scheduling

By appointment

Common Questions

Things people ask before reaching out.

If you have a question that isn't here, bring it to the free consultation.

Betrayal trauma occurs when someone you deeply trusted violates that trust in a profound way — through infidelity, pornography addiction, or hidden sexual behavior. Unlike ordinary relationship conflict, betrayal trauma creates a neurological wound. Your nervous system registers it as a threat to survival, not just a relationship problem. That's why symptoms like hypervigilance, intrusive thoughts, and physical shock are so common — and why specialized treatment matters.
No. In fact, that pressure is one of the most unfair things about this situation. You don't have to know. The goal of therapy is to stabilize you first — to help you feel safe in your own nervous system again — so that any decision you eventually make comes from clarity, not panic.
CSAT stands for Certified Sex Addiction Therapist, a specialized clinical credential requiring advanced training in sexual addiction and its impact on partners and families. Only a few thousand therapists in the country hold this certification. It means Debbie has been specifically trained to understand the dynamics of betrayal in the context of out-of-control sexual behavior, not just general relationship conflict.
My primary focus is supporting betrayed partners. I also work with couples navigating their healing using the Early Couples Recovery Empathy Model — but the entry point is typically the betrayed partner's stability first. If you're the partner who caused harm and you're looking for how to help the relationship heal, please reach out — we can talk about what that path looks like.
Rebuilding trust after betrayal is not about simply "letting go" or moving on — it is about repairing a deep rupture in safety, attachment, and emotional security. Trust is rebuilt through consistent, accountable behavior over time, where actions align with words and the betraying partner demonstrates empathy, transparency, and reliability. With the right therapeutic support, healing becomes possible, not just in learning to trust your partner again, but in reconnecting to your own instincts, boundaries, and sense of inner safety.
You don't have to feel ready. Most people start in the middle of acute pain, not after it resolves. If you're in it right now and you've been trying to manage alone, that's often enough of a sign. A free 15-minute consultation is a low-pressure way to ask questions and see if this feels like the right fit.
Yes. Everything shared in individual therapy is confidential and protected by law. Your spouse, partner, or anyone else cannot access your session records without your written consent. The only exceptions are narrow legal requirements — which I'll explain clearly at the start of our work together.
Both EMDR and Brainspotting are body-based trauma therapies that work without requiring you to talk through every detail of what happened. EMDR uses bilateral stimulation — often eye movements or tapping — to help your brain process stuck memories. Brainspotting uses your field of vision to access where trauma is held in the body. Most people describe both as feeling different from regular talk therapy — often more settled, less reactivated, and more spacious.

You've been carrying this alone
long enough.

You don't have to decide anything today except whether to have a conversation. The consultation is free, there's no pressure, and you can ask anything you need to ask.

Message Me You are ready for recovery. Let me guide you on your healing journey.